Two women on a train (in India)
#42: A 100-word story of machiavellian drama on a train
Two women on a train (in India)
Payal (25) meets Seema (61) in a train compartment headed to Meerut. They get talking. Payal shares she’s uprooting herself to marry her love — infantryman Manohar.
Seema exclaims, “I made that mistake! Married an infantryman. As expected, he was stationed without family at the country’s border for decades. He cheated, and abandoned me and his son...”
Terrified, Payal disembarks the train.
At Meerut station, Manohar arrives looking for Payal. Shocked to see Seema instead, he exclaims, “Mother??!!”
Seema tells Manohar she’s arranged his marriage, “To a suitable girl, unlike the modern harlots who run around claiming love, romance, etc. Bah!”
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reena | 03.15.24
*Meerut is a small town with an army base in northern India.
*Some context about Army life in India: The situation above involves a curiosity of Indian army life, particularly for personnel in combat units frequently posted on the border in what are referred to as “field areas”. Unlike the US, which benefits inordinately from its isolated geography, India's borders are surrounded by enemy countries and heavily militarized. Combat personnel stationed here are often away from their families for long periods.
Wicked enough for you?
I wrote a 10-minute play (“Crossings”) with this story, for a couple of play contests (prayers, please!). Then decided to also render it as a 100-word microfiction—one of the hardest ones I’ve done. Not sure if it works. You tell me!
If it made any sense, what did you think of Manohar’s mother Seema? Ms. Machiavelli herself?
Did she somehow find out about Manohar’s romantic wedding plans with Payal, and with some basic sleuthing get on the right train to get Payal (physically and metaphorically) out of the picture? Or was the meeting on the train a serendipitous opportunity that Seema smartly took advantage of?
As I wrote the play I discovered the answer; but I’m curious to hear what YOU think. Yes, I’ll share the play as well at some point.
A Cautionary PSA: This story depicts a greatly overstated view of “field area” Army life in India emanating from Seema’s scheming mouth for obvious self-serving reasons. Yet there’s no doubt the (mostly) men in combat units and their separated families pay a heavy price for such service. The need for drama of course begets much exaggeration, which I humbly offer here. BUT do NOT take Seema’s view as fact! She’s a wholly unreliable storyteller.
In any case, I’d love your thoughts on this story. Thank you for bearing with my experiments!
Published!
One of my 100-word stories “Listen to Him” was published in this online literary magazine called “Five Minute Lit” here. Check it out here.
Up Next
Maya: The Middle i.e., part 2 of 3 of the dystopian love story I’m serializing on this blog, comes out in two days (Sunday, June 16th). Hope you’re reading along!
In case you missed it, here’s part 1.
Ciao!
Your query appears to have a psychological basis. An individual’s response on reading and choosing the background narrative, tells a lot about that individual’s thought processes and background. Both women, in my mind, are good manipulators. I suspect a mutual (tacit) agreement at their parting. Neither was really enthralled with the marriage - the younger got swept up in romantic visions and the older saw right through her. Cynical me has seen both parties over the years.
I loved the premise and how you condensed the story.
Thoroughly enjoyed, as I do enjoy all your stories.